Confidence is critical for your success. If you don’t believe in yourself, who will?
To boost confidence, most of us focus on adopting habits and techniques to accomplish it. While taking steps to improve yourself and your self-esteem is indeed important, there could also be some subconscious and embedded routines that are dragging it down.
That’s why you should focus on the toxic things that confident people don’t do.
Here are some of the habits, attitudes and behaviors they avoid at all costs. You’ll be surprised at how they’re affecting your own confidence:
They don’t compare themselves to others
One of the most significant things confident people don’t do is comparison. When you wonder why others are more wealthy and successful than you, it leads to you blaming yourself.
Everyone has unique circumstances and challenges in their life and we’re all at different starting points. It’s useless to compare your special skills and environment to anyone else’s. The only person you should compare yourself to is the person you were yesterday.
They don’t expect to be constantly perfect
Often, we strive for perfection because we seek approval and praise from others. When we obsess over how others perceive us, we are left unhappy, disappointed, and unconfident. American journalist, activist, author of six best-selling books Maria Shriver once said, “Perfectionism doesn’t make you feel perfect; it makes you feel inadequate.” Next time you find yourself in this endless cycle of thinking your best isn’t good enough, take a moment to find gratitude for all you’ve been able to accomplish – and then move on.
They don’t talk down to themselves
Studies have found that we say hundreds of words to ourselves every single minute. If you practice negative self-talk, that’s a lot of harmful words you’re internalizing.
We all have negative thoughts (they’re impossible to avoid), but truly confident people recognize when they’re beating themselves up, and they take steps to stop it in its tracks.
If you’re encountering a negative self-talk spiral, the best solution is to recognize it for what it truly is: unfounded self-doubt. We often direct bad feelings towards ourselves, when they are actually just reactions to a momentary setback or bad day.
Don’t let your temporary negative feelings impact your self-belief in your permanent skills and abilities.